In my relatively short time on this fair planet, I've learned that queer people are not only dangerous but incredibly powerful.
Hardly a week goes by without a politician, religious figure or breathless talking head having a public meltdown about the "gay agenda" and our plot to take over the world and douse it in glitter and lube.
Still, rather than use our dark, perverted magic to do something useful, like, say, secure equal employment protections or prevent hate crimes, we wily queers have instead spent our time scheming to find ways to destroy the holy sacrament of marriage (wait, aren't straight people doing a competent job on their own?) and cause meteorological mischief like Hurricane Katrina and superstorm Sandy.
