(JESSE on the BRINK) Safety First!

by Jesse Archer

Just TRY drowning!! Or stepping on a blue-ringed octopus, or swimming outside the flags... because guess who's North Bondi's newest lifeguard!!??

After months of training on CPR, First Aid, boards plus loads of Run-swim-runs and signals, I finally got my certificate and join the rest of my amazing squad of Bronze Medallion lifesavers! Huge thanks to our incredible and incredibly patient trainers Drew, Jodie, Rhys and Rhys! Season is over, but I start patrolling next summer... Is your faith restored in the safety of Sydney's beaches?

ceremony inside the clubhouse. Those windows look like paintings!

(JESSE on the BRINK) a Bondi Classic!

by Jesse Archer

Almost exactly 1,000 people decided on a particularly perfect day to jump into the water, thwack and be thwacked, gulp seawater, undulate with the rolling tides and compete in a 2km ocean swim race. I was one of them! And maybe it was just me gulping seawater...

 

I'm in there somewhere – the third heat breaking the surf. Results-wise, I placed #437, so in the top half. Looking to improve the next race... if my party schedule allows time to train for it!

 

I survived!

(JESSE on the BRINK) Just another Saturday in Sydney!

by Jesse Archer

The day started off normally enough. We took our friends Noah and Leo to see the movie Frozen. 

But that evening my straight, lifesaving friend Rhys decided to have a drag celebration for his 30th birthday at the Burdekin. We also had tickets with friends to see a tango concert at Sydney Town Hall that same night. And wouldn't you know – it took so long getting ready that we weren't going to have to change outfits. So this is how we rocked up to Town Hall.

The bevel pose is to die for, no? Such a lady! Simon was none too happy that this kind of exposure was going to happen in front of a discerning live audience and felt all sorts of pressure but somehow, SIMONE got right into it and didn't mind at all!

(JESSE on the BRINK) Alone At The TOP!

by Jesse Archer

Just last month, actress Joan Fontaine (of Hitchcock's Rebecca and Suspicion) died, aged 96. She was the younger sister, and bitter rival, of actress Olivia de Havilland, aged 97. Theirs was Hollywood's premiere family feud, a lifelong rivalry supposedly nurtured from a very young age by their mother.

Fontaine is now dead, but she still managed to get the last word. Fontaine once told the Hollywood Reporter, "I married before Olivia, I got an Oscar before her, and if I die before her she'll be furious I beat her to it."

I'm now concerned for Olivia's health, as I figured it was the hate that kept them alive.

(Jesse on the Brink) Holiday Hunks!

by Jesse Archer

Have you seen Stranger By The Lake? It's a French drama that won the Queer Palm at Cannes...

It's set at a summertime lakeshore gay cruising area where men sunbathe nude and cruise in the nearby foliage.

(JESSE on the BRINK) Game Changers!

by Jesse Archer

 

Finished the Blackmores Half-Marathon Saturday. Gorgeous day racing across the stunning Harbour Bridge and finishing at the iconic Opera House. I came in at 1:27 (158 of 7500), and that includes an unprecedented (but 911 emergency) port-a-john pit stop at around the 12k mark! Not at my peak, but I was happy to have achieved my personal goal to beat anyone wearing headphones, an artillery belt, compression socks or those hideous primate shoes with toes.

 

For some reason, the half-marathon began before the full, which meant getting up at 4:30 and across the harbour for a 6:15 am start. And the spectacular scenery was dulled by the dull (and deadly quiet) streets of the CBD and its raked overpasses... but just look at this finish!

(JESSE on the BRINK) TWELVE Year Pessimist!

by Jesse Archer

Twelve years ago, I was making breakfast in the Lower East Side when I heard a massive crash that sounded like thunder. I looked out the window and saw only a clear blue Tuesday morning, unaware everything had changed.

Am I a pessimist if every year on 9/11, I think of this inspirational quote? "Never doubt a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has."

(JESSE on the BRINK) The Good with the Bad!

by Jesse Archer

Pop Princesses. The rah rah rivalry over Katy Perry's ROAM and Lady Gaga's APPLAUSE has reached sharknado proportions. I just want to give them both a nice melatonin-infused chai tea, wash off the grease paint, read a bedtime story, pat their heads and put them to bed. Then their nightmares begin: Beyonce reclaims the mantle of planet pop as they sleep with yet another formula guaranteed hit.

Batman. Fucking hell. An entire news cycle on the casting of Ben Affleck as the next Batman? How many Batmans do we have to deal with? Is there another superhero, preferably one who knows how to have a good time? Now he's being paired with Superman, who is just as prolific and tiresome. With three hours of exposition that was all backstory, I should have read the book. Henry Cavill's dreary,  deadly serious Superman had all the thrills of a prolapsed anus.

Lisa Bonet. I might watch Batman if he were Jason Mamoa aka Kahl Drogo from Game Of Thrones in his own superhero suit. Why does Lisa Bonet need to rest? The reason you have not seen hide nor hair from Lisa Bonet since that Cosby Show spinoff is because she's been working overtime laying (claim to) the finest men on the planet. I wouldn't even say she was the most attractive Huxtable (maybe Vanessa, or even mother Claire) but Lisa Bonet and her charms (twerking?) landed both Mamoa and Lenny Kravitz – whereupon she quickly punctuated her success by having their babies. She may be greedy, but the girl has taste.

(JESSE on the BRINK) Getting Serious!

by Jesse Archer

My essay in this month's OUT magazine was one I found difficult to write. It talks about what it's like being diagnosed with HIV later in life, giving voice to a population we don't often hear from. It also focused on my friend Jerry so treading carefully around a touchy topic while being as frank as possible was compounded by feeling the pressure to do justice to, and not misrepresent, his own story. If you don't have this month's issue, check it out online here. Out includes a great illustration by Keith Negley.

(JESSE on the BRINK) Winking IT!

by Jesse Archer

My boss was sick and kindly offered me his tickets to the Helpmann Awards, honoring achievement in live art entertainment - sort of an Australian version of the Tony's. I hadn't seen any of the stage shows, but following the Sydney imperative: take any chance you get to go to visit the Opera House or harbour beaches, I went with Gerald. We saw and heard from Tina Arena, Baz Luhrmann and a bunch of people that were of great interest to a bunch of people in the know.