Trigger warning: Transphobia. A lot of transphobia.
A month ago my friend Todd Clayton came out as a recovering transphobe in an incisive Huffington Post blog post, "The Queer Community Has to Stop Being Transphobic." In the piece Clayton details his personal journey toward transgender acceptance, explaining how a speech by Matrix co-director Lana Wachowski, an out trans woman, opened his eyes to the quiet bigotry in his own life. Clayton hadn't openly attacked trans people or worked against their freedoms; he was transphobic in ways that a lot of cisgender members of the gay, lesbian and bisexual communities are: insensitive and dismissive, not realizing the ways in which trans lives and struggles intersect with our own.
When he asked me to read the piece, I told him that his experience is common among cisgender people in the LGB community. In fact, I've made a similar journey. I told Todd that if he ever published his piece, I would come out with my own story. This is that story. It's not easy to tell. I've been holding on to it for a while, keeping it secret and safe. But it can't stay secret anymore.
