by
Jesse Archer
We've watched the drag queen invasion for YEARS, but finally got ourselves together to participate. Every year on July 4th, a rainbow boatload of queens invades the Fire Island Pines harbor to great fanfare. We raided the drag box and used our imagination. CoolDan and I went as "Miss Universe and her Pet Dragon".
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| Anita Groom |
Anita took her mother's 1959 wedding dress (designed by "Buffalo's Best Bridal"). When I asked Anita if her mother knew she would be doing drag in her wedding dress, Anita answered, "My mom thinks I took it to a consignment shop in New York."
That's us at the back of the fairy ferry. Not only is it listing, I nearly lost my balance and made a real splash. Not that I would have minded...
As usual, it all begins in Cherry Grove. This is how it began, when a drag queen was once refused service in the Pines - so a group of drag queens "invaded" the next week and everyone loved it. The tradition never died, although most of the queens did.
At Cherry Grove's Ice Palace, everyone gets ready. Miss Universe, her Pet Dragon and Anita Groom:
People didn't know what to think when I said "Miss Universe and her Pet Dragon" so I'd add, "We're a re-telling of the classic Icelandic fairy tale" and then they'd nod, knowingly.
We were frumpy compared to the imagination of many others:
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| "Tormenta" |
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| Zelda |
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| Ryan and Carmen Miranda |
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| China (right) is the only drag queen alive from the original invasion! |
Anita is threatening to photoshop an image of her mother's wedding day with the one below and title it: "Who Wore It Better?"
Loading onto the boat.
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| Jilted bride OVERBOARD! |
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| the "Drag Repair" crew put Band-Aids on my feet. Their card said they'd been servicing the invasion for 15 years. |
We recycled the shoes from Pride the week before. Those stilettos made the scabs rip and me bleed all over again which hurt real bad until we got to the three hour open bar in the Pines. Vodka tonic, indeed!
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| I'm the queen of the world? |
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| not a very ladylike pose, Miss Universe. |
An impromptu singing of the Star Spangled Banner as we departed.
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| Police escort! |
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| Sailing into the Pines |
As we arrive, the masses at the harbor welcome us... all set to a blaring "God Bless America". It's pretty amazing. We walked a red carpet at the pool where they tear you apart for all those assembled... and then hit the back patio of our pal Jean-Manuel's island store Gostoso:
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| Friends! |
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| Drag queens get away with everything. |
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| Anita shamelessly proposing to all the hot boys. Hi Denton! |
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| Becky Beaver and Heather NumberOne - all the way from Australia!! |
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| My pet dragon gets a foot massage, foolin around in Gostoso! |
After multiple parties - we got kicked out of due to my pet dragon getting gold paint all over the house... we made the long slog back to Cherry Grove via the Meat Rack.
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