It’s August 3, 2012, and people are gathering for a wedding in the northern seaport town of Findhorn, Scotland. Propped up on a chair in the front row amid a slew of mingling guests is an iPad bearing the smiling faces of Mum 1 and Mom 2. It’s not because of an illness or the expense of overseas travel that they are attending their son and future daughter-in-law’s big day via Skype from their living room thousands of miles away in San Jose, Calif. It’s because if Mum 1 — Karin, a U.K. citizen — leaves the United States, she will be barred for at least a decade from reentering this country and returning to the home she shares with her American wife, Judy — a.k.a. Mom 2.
Karin is 73 years old, born in Germany during World War II (when birth certificates were still emblazoned with swastikas!). Being prohibited from going home for 10 years is not a risk she can take, even if it means missing her son’s wedding. If Judy could have successfully sponsored her for a green card, they would certainly be present to celebrate with family and friends, who each take turns visiting the iPad to say congratulations before taking their seats. But she can’t. The Defense of Marriage Act only recognizes opposite-sex marriages for all federal matters including immigration, so Judy and Karin are stuck in California, unable to travel internationally.
