(POP NEWS) Bi Victory; UPS; Trumped; Tower Torture; Crazy; Secret Bomb; Chaz; RPat Coming Out; David Furnish, Jr!

• BI-PARTY: Sinema Victorious in Arizona House Race; Becomes 1st Openly Bisexual Member of Congress!

• DAMAGE CONTROL: UPS Dumps the Boy Scouts Over its Anti-Gay Policies! 

• FIRED: 465K Sign 'Dump Trump' Plea to Macy's!

• TORTURE: Tower of London Guards Spot Thief, Watch Helplessly!

• POTTER-INSPIRED: New 'Invisibility Cloak' Actually Works—Sort Of!

•  CRAZY PILL: How Field Became Mary Todd Lincoln!

• WTF? Janeane Garofalo Was Married for 20 Years, Didn't Know It!

• OFFENSIVE: Victoria's Secret Sorry About the Headdress!

• D-BOMB: We've Been Getting Dumber —for Thousands of Years!

• TRANS-FAT: Chaz Bono embarks on public weight loss!

• ALMOST OUT: Robert Pattinson Suggests That the 'Twilight' Series Continue with a Gay Twist!

• DAVID, Jr: Elton John and David Furnish Expecting Second Child!