Barack Obama. - I never thought it was a possibility until I saw the tabloid cover pictured to the right. Although, honestly, if I opened that up in the grocery store checkout line, I probably would've been more drawn to the story about the "Rampaging Chimp Tragedy." That sounds nuts.
If The Globe says it, it must be true.
Still, tabloid speculation and being one of the most pro-gay rights presidents ever isn't enough to push him any higher on the list than last.
- John F. Kennedy - We all know he took down more women than the math portion of the SAT (Kidding! I'm kidding! Stereotypes hurt!) -- which suggests he wasn't gay. That being said, a book called Jack and Lem dug deep into his lifelong friendship with a gay man named Lem Billings... and at least threw some iffiness into the mix. The author of the book, David Pitts, says he concluded JFK and Lem never got physically intimate with each other... but were definitely emotionally intimate.
"I'm firmly convinced after working on this book that John Kennedy's sexual interests were in women. We don't need much evidence of that, the evidence is all over the place. But his strongest emotional attachments were to men, and principally, to Lem. We don't have a word for that, right? Somebody who prefers the opposite gender for sexuality, and the same gender for deep, emotional attachments?"
In other words, JFK subscribes to the Homer Simpson philosophy on gender -- Marge: "He prefers the company of men." Homer: "Who doesn't?"
- Martin Van Buren - Anytime a president is single when he's in office (which has barely happened), whispers start up. And, sure, Van Buren was single because his wife died of tuberculosis at age 35, a few years before he was elected. But he never remarried. So there's always been a mild murmur. But we're talking, like, a Ryan Seacrest murmur, not an Anderson Cooper murmur.
Bill Clinton - I'm just saying: You find yourself involved in enough threesome, foursomes, ninesomes and dodecasomes and eventually you're going to cross swords with someone.
No ex-president parties harder.
- Thomas Jefferson - There was a sarcastic New Yorker write-up of why Thomas Jefferson might've been gay last year. He says he used Toni Morrison standards (filling "every trope"). Me-ow.
Anyway, some highlights of that article include: He was America's first foodie, he imported fine exotic foods, but always stayed skinny... he obsessively decorated and chose furniture for Monticello... he never remarried after his wife died at age 39... he loved Paris... he seems to have dyed his hair... he had a lisp... and he loved birdwatching.
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Sunday, September 18, 2011
LIST: 11 US Presidents Who Might've Been Gay!
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