CULTURE: Wills, Kate Set Date for '12!

We've heard this so often that someone's going to get it right sooner or later: Prince William will at long, long, long last marry ever-so-longtime girlfriend Kate Middleton, reports the News of the World, but it ain't gonna be this weekend in Vegas. The plodding prince will take a trip down the aisle in spring 2012, the tab says: just ahead of London's hotly anticipated Olympiad, Wills' 30th birthday, and the queen's Jubilee.

"William and Kate are both aware a royal wedding followed by the jubilee celebrations and the Olympics will really put Britain on the map again," a "senior adviser" tells the NOTW. "The powers that be, and I mean right to the top, see this as the perfect opportunity to secure the monarchy at the heart of the people at a time when the media focus is on our country." Let the games begin!